Can You Imagine Us?
by Dr. Fluffmuffin
Summary: Lloyd insists that he doesn't have a favorite ninja, but he does, and it's Kai.
1. Today

**I was digging through my drafts and came across this, so I thought I'd share. I think there's supposed to be a part two (and three), but as of now it's all unfinished. I hope you enjoy. I don't own Ninjago.**

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The first time Lloyd meets Kai, he knows in his heart that he's going to like this new friend best.

Well, that's not true. The first time Lloyd meets Kai is on a cold morning in Jamanakai village, where he tries and fails to rob it of all its candy. The next few times they meet are similar in circumstance, right down to being betrayed by his former allies. Lloyd then only knows Kai as an adversary with big hair and a bigger ego, not someone he'd want near him—ever.

Even if his hair is...kind of cool.

The first time he truly meets him is after he's rescued from Pythor-the jerk ex-friend-in mid-spring. The morning after his uncle welcomed him on the ship, he wakes up in a room he doesn't know. Though a second scared, the wild events of the day before rush back like a crack of lightning, and suddenly he's nervous for a different reason.

Now that these people, these kids, he's called enemies for so long were friends, what would they think of him? What did that make him? Would they like him as a friend? A person?

Lloyd tells himself he isn't scared—over and over, because he isn't—but he finds himself sinking into his sweatshirt until the collar rises to his nose and the hood falls over his face. They were probably already up and eating. What would they do if he walked right in? He can already imagine their faces—for some reason, with their masks—and the thought makes his stomach queasy.

He isn't nervous, though. Just seasick. Perhaps, he thinks, if he waits long enough, he'll miss them entirely and wouldn't have to worry about whether they'd like him.

No, if _he_ liked them.

He's doing them a favor by staying here. Yes, the Ninja just aren't prepared for the awesome power and judgement of one Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon—

"Lloyd?"

The call and a knock are all the warning Lloyd receives before his Uncle Wu slides back the door, looking pleasant and familiar on this cool morning. If nothing else, Lloyd is certain of his Uncle's affection; no one has ever smiled to him so kindly and meant it.

Wu's face is covered in smile lines; on top of his mustache and around his eyes especially. Lloyd hadn't noticed those before.

"You're going to miss breakfast," he says, "You'll want to join us; Zane has made blueberry pancakes."

His stomach growls on 'blueberry' alone, but Lloyd can't seem to sit up, move his legs. He's paralyzed, he gathers; he must have been injured in that fight yesterday after all. He better stay all day in bed, just to make sure he doesn't damage himself further; he is a growing boy, after all—

"Lloyd?" Wu steps into the room, "You're not nervous, are you?"

Lloyd throws back the blanket and kicks it away from himself, "Of course not," he feels himself flush as he stands, puffing out his chest, "I just don't see why we have to eat breakfast so darn early."

It's nine o'clock, currently. If he were at Darkly's, he would've eaten by seven, and if he were still on his own, it would be by six, if he ate at all.

By the door, Wu still smiles at him, as if Lloyd has always been here and not attacking his students for the last four and a half months. "It's alright if you are," he says, "but you've no need."

"I'm not worried," Lloyd twists his face as he says it, "I'm just hungry. Hunger makes me nervous. Now where's the kitchen?"

He is perfectly comfortable in his new home, so he sidesteps his uncle and marches down the hall, swinging open the door—

—to a closet.

To show Wu that he meant to do this, he looks over the contents for a moment before turning back with a grunt. "Just looking for some games," he tells his amused uncle as he hurries past.

_Stupid,_ he chides himself.

The first time Lloyd meets Kai, he's just a little bit nervous.

The ninja are gathered around a relatively small table for a group this size, and the expressions they eye him with are...hard to describe. Certainly not as chummy as he would have liked. They aren't yelling at him, or throwing things, or doing anything else that Lloyd expected, so he marks that as a plus.

A plus in a series of minuses.

He fixes them with his most devilish frown before he sits in the last empty seat at the table.

"That's Sensei's spot," comes Jay's voice, not angry, not unkind, but the message is clear.

_Not for you. Not yours. Not ever._

"I don't see his name on it."

They don't respond; Lloyd can feel all eyes on him. He stares at a distant spot on the wall, wondering if the looks he would receive at Darkly's, or the glowers from his Serpentine ex-friends, would be better than this.

"Would you like a plate?" comes a voice, soft.

Lloyd looks up. The blond one next to him—Zane—smiles, and it looks genuine enough for him to nod.

The ninja next reaches for a steaming stack at the center of the table, and with that movement, whatever spell he'd cast upon entering the room breaks, everyone returning to their meal. It's quiet, not in the way that no sound is being made, but in that no one speaks, or even looks, really, at him as they go about their business. Zane hands him a plate and minds his own meal, and Cole quibbles something about Jay needing to, "keep his own darn feet in his own darn bunk."

Only the girl—Nya? —on his other side continues looking at him, sharp eyed and contemplative, and Kai, who frowns at the opposite end of the table. Lloyd sticks his tongue out at both before stabbing a fork into his pancakes, which truly do look delectable. If for no other reason, he decides, should it come to that, he can stay here for the food.

Three pancakes and half of a fourth one later, Wu walks into the room. He darts quick glances around the room, sizing the atmosphere, "I trust you're all getting along?" he says.

The ninja's responses come in hums, none of them enthusiastic. Lloyd scoops the rest of the pancake up and shoves it into his mouth, biting down hard.

"I see," says Wu, unmoving, "Have you introduced yourselves?"

"We already know each other," says Cole, looking back.

"Not as friends, you don't," says Wu, and no one argues with him, "Please," he continues, "Introduce yourselves."

Lloyd wishes his uncle would can it and exit to the other room, but everyone knows better than to disobey. They stop and place their forks down; the utensils clatter against the table. Lloyd just focuses on chewing as everyone looks at him once again. He's unable to decipher their expressions, but they start smiling, one at a time, small and slow expressions. Not all of them manage to be more than polite, but they help ease the knot growing in his stomach.

Zane extends a hand first, saying, "I'm Zane; I'm excited to have you join us."

Lloyd doesn't know what to say to that. Yesterday he was out running wild and evil, attacking the ninja. Now, he simply doesn't know where to go from here.

Cole is next, reaching across the table to take his hand in his own. His is large and warm, and it swallows Lloyd's whole. "Welcome aboard," is all Cole says. He doesn't smile as he speaks it, but there's a spark in his eyes, and the statement is neutral, hopeful.

_I can know you; _it says.

Lloyd thinks the same.

Next is Jay, who wrinkles his nose after touching Lloyd's hand; Lloyd can't help that it's sweaty, "Just stay out of my comics and you'll be good."

"Only if your comics are trash," says Lloyd. He doesn't take kindly the implication that he'd go snooping through everyone's stuff, however true it may be.

Next, the girl takes his hand, "I'm Nya," she says, "You look like fun."

That surprises him. Sure, she's been looking at him since he walked in the room, but one can't tell much from his appearance except that maybe he should choose his role models a little more wisely.

_She's just being nice._

Still, Lloyd looks her over again. She's muscular, pretty—for a girl—and he can't tell anything more than that. He'll assume she's fun, too. That's the polite way to think.

Lloyd blinks and wonders when he'd started worrying about politeness. He gives Nya a scowl before drawing his hand away.

Last is Kai, who Lloyd doesn't really meet until after breakfast, in a hallway, next to a closet. At the table, he merely stares Lloyd down and, after Wu clears his throat, mutters an introduction that's nothing more than a 'hello' and a name.

Lloyd can take it. He's glad for its brief nature, frankly. The mix of conversation and introduction make breakfast an exhausting experience, to say the least. Lloyd is quick to leave afterwards.

That's when he meets Kai. Losing himself on his way back to the room he'd spent the night in, he winds up next to a closet, Kai staring down at him. Kai isn't that much taller than him, but the intensity of the glare he sports makes him tower.

Lloyd isn't the least bit intimidated, but he finds himself puffing out his chest, holding his breath to keep from breathing too hard.

"Lloyd," Kai greets first.

His mind tells him to think of something insulting to say, a rude name with the sole intention of poking some wired nerve, but he comes up empty. His Darkly's peers would be terribly disappointed.

To ease off the feeling, he settles for the 'stink eye', a specialty of his, "Kai."

For a moment they stare at each other, then Kai breaks the stare and takes a breath.

"Before you do anything here, I need to make some things clear," he says, and Lloyd braces himself for the worst.

"First of all," says Kai, talking like this is a speech he's been preparing for a while, "Your evil shenanigans won't be tolerated, so don't even think about plotting, alright?"

Lloyd frowns and opens his mouth to respond, but Kai moves on before he can get a sound out.

"Second, you have to treat Sensei with respect. He's really rooting for you, so if you can't be nice to us, be nice to him."

That hurts Lloyd more than he expects; he opens his mouth again, but still, Kai goes on.

"Third!" Kai holds up a finger, like this is the most important point, "You can't stick your tongue out at my sister. That's a sibling thing only, got it?"

Lloyd has half a mind to stick his tongue out right there, but Kai keeps talking. And here he thought that Jay was the one that wouldn't shut up.

"I want your time here to be pleasant for all of us," Kai folds his hands in front of him, "Do you think that's possible?"

There's a second of stunned silence before a mix of anger and spite fuel Lloyd forward, "Not with you and your stupid rules. For one, I'll plot as much as I like; two, your Sensei is _my _uncle, and I'll decide if I want to be nice to him, and three, I'll stick my tongue out at whoever I like, because guess what?" Lloyd puts on his most wicked grin, "I'm your new brother now."

To his disappointment, Kai doesn't get angry; he just pulls his lips back in disgust, like this is no more than he expected. That makes Lloyd mad, so he sticks out his tongue with as much force and unbridled spite as he can manage.

Kai looks offended for a moment—Lloyd takes a point—and then he mirrors the expression. It's utterly childish, so Lloyd takes another point before donning a worse face, this time bringing his hands up to complete the picture.

Kai huffs a sigh, as though he expected Lloyd to be the mature one here, the hypocrite, then he does something odd. He frowns, crosses his eyes, then sticks his tongue out and touches the tip of his nose. Lloyd gasps in surprise. No one at Darkly's, not even Brad, had the ability to do that.

Lloyd is...impressed. He's not going to lose impromptu contest, however. He reaches and pulls his cheeks apart—makes a frog face—and crosses his eyes the best he can. For extra finesse, he adds a disgusting, "Bleurgh!"

But Kai seems prepared. He smirks, pulls his lips inward, and pulls the dopiest expression Lloyd thinks he's ever seen. Lloyd snorts without meaning to, and Kai graces him a smile.

"Hold on," he says, turning and bounding out of the hallway. When he returns, he's a roll of scotch tape in his hand, "This'll help."

It does.

When Lloyd truly meets Kai, they're standing next to a closet, taping each other's faces into scary positions. It's gross and hilarious and painful all at once, and Lloyd can't remember the last time he's had so much fun.

At some point, Lloyd thinks to grab a flashlight for more intense expression, and Kai is quick to supply him with one. Soon, they're laughing, and Lloyd forgets about any animosity he might have had.

When the last piece of tape is strung off the roll, and they've nothing left to make, Kai is smiling at him without a hint of malice. He looks like Wu did in the morning, and it lifts a weight off Lloyd's shoulders that he didn't even know was there.

Then Kai throws out a hand; it's warm and calloused, "Welcome to the family, kiddo."

When Lloyd takes it and shakes it, he has a feeling that he's going to like this one best.

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**Let me know if you want the other two parts to this (I might just publish them anyway, but that's up in the air currently).**

**As always, thank you for reading! Have a fantastic day!**


	2. Same

**It would appear that these parts have no relation to each other, but I assure you that they all have the same theme. Thank you for your interest. I do not own Ninjago.**

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Lloyd prides himself on his ability not to cry. It's a skill he's worked on for years—ever since his first night at Darkly's, when he learned that crying made you a target for abuse and ridicule. Instead, he takes his tears and locks them up in a little box towards the back of his mind, where dark shadows hide them from view.

As much as he tries, he can't seem to throw away the key, which is why sometimes the tears escape, get close to the surface.

A chilly afternoon finds Lloyd running as fast as he can through the streets of the village near his father's monastery—no, Wu's teashop—past shops and houses, through lots and sidewalks. He feels small today, terribly small and almost weightless, enough to wonder if he could lift himself off the ground if he just ran fast enough.

It's a stupid thought, childish, and with a growl, he skids to a halt at the bottom of a hill, next to a vacant lot and a playground. He holds his hands to his face, where his cheeks sting and his eyes burn, but he wills himself not to cry.

It's cold out today, and Lloyd hates it. It's springtime, and springtime is supposed to be warm. But it's cold, the trees still bare, the birds huddling close on wiry branches, wheezing instead of singing.

Lloyd stands at the bottom of the hill, looking up at them and shivering.

Then a noise sounds behind him, a distant huff as someone patters down the hill after him. Lloyd turns to see a flash of red and a ridiculous head of hair. He groans, steps away. Kai followed him. Of course he followed him.

Lloyd made a scene, and quite the scene it was. A lump spikes deep in his throat as images from earlier flood his mind. Feeling panic start to hit him, he searches for a fast way out. His eyes find a set of swings over in the playground, and he heads towards it.

His heart thunders in his chest, not entirely the product of exertion. He sits against the metal seat, rocking a little as he toes a path through the trough that's been kicked out by hundreds, maybe thousands of feet before him.

Kai is still heading towards him, walking now. Lloyd hopes he won't try and talk to him; he's scared of what he might say.

When Kai reaches him, he's panting from his extended sprint, "You run fast for a little guy," he says as he bends his hands to his knees.

Lloyd snorts and almost cries. "I'm not little. Just short." _I'm fine,_ he lies, eyeing the sky, where fluffy white clouds sail over an endless hue of blue.

His friend stands there, wheezing like an old man, before finally straightening. Lloyd knows the look in his eyes; he's seen it a million times, and he's grown to hate it more than most of the awful things that happen to him.

It's concern.

Lloyd expects Kai to ask or even demand that he tell him how he feels. Wu sometimes does that. And his mom. They make him spill everything so that they can sort through and eventually clean up the mess, but Lloyd hates the spill. Oh, how he hates it. He can't and doesn't want to do that here, not now, not ever.

But Kai just says, "What did it?"

Lloyd blinks. Thinks.

He didn't mean to run away. He didn't mean to freak out or panic. But it happened so suddenly; at his father's monastery—no, his uncle's teashop—they were moving out swathes of things in preparation for the change. It turns out a teashop is quite different from a monastery; they need to remodel the entire building. They want to start fresh. Something new.

Lloyd did too. Does.

There's a lot that needs to be moved out, entire boxes in fact. Lloyd, Kai, and Cole were carrying them out to the van, where Jay intended to drive everything to his family's scrapyard.

And then.

Lloyd puts his face in his hands. The swing rocks slowly as he rolls his weight around on his toes.

It was Lloyd's idea to put a rugged welcome mat in front of the store's entrance. Something about it had seemed so inviting when he'd passed it in the local garden store; they just had to have it in front of their new store.

Cole—_the big dope_, thinks Lloyd in anger—kicked it up by mistake, folding it halfway over itself. Unable to see where he was going, Lloyd tripped on the way out the door, dropping the box he held in his hands, spilling its contents.

Lloyd inhales and holds his breath, wishing the lump in his throat would disappear. It's spiking in a painful way that he can feel all the way down in his lungs. Kai is still waiting for an answer, but Lloyd can't speak around the nasty feeling.

His father's belongings spilled out all over the pavement.

Some of it was generic, stuff Lloyd wouldn't recognize as personally Garmadon's, but then other objects came out, like the little blue mug Garmadon would fill with coffee every morning, the colorful, tassled blanket he'd keep on the end of the bed, and lastly, the—

"The sweater." Lloyd shakes his head, dropping his gaze and glaring at a spot in the dirt, "It was the sweater. That stupid sweater."

Lloyd doesn't know how to describe it, except that he hates the thing. It's the ugliest garment in existence. He can't tell what color it's supposed to be, but it has everything from red to yellow and green, all mixed up in a pattern he could only describe as "artistically interpreted vomit stains."

Lloyd hates it. He hated it from the day Garmadon picked it up, in a thrift store on the outskirts of Ninjago City.

"I need gentle clothes," said Garmadon back on that day, when it rained so hard that water seeped into the soles of their shoes and tracked puddles onto the sunken tiles, "I need to look approachable."

No need to look evil anymore. He said that, Lloyd agreed, then he turned and pulled the sweater from a rack, the sweater of demons.

"Look, Lloyd," said Garmadon—his voice is still clear in Lloyd's mind, "It's hideous," he sounded utterly fascinated as he added, airily, "I must have it."

Lloyd remembers his reply, muffled as he chewed through a bag of cheese puffs, "I thought you didn't want to look evil."

Garmadon shrugged, taking the article, a monument of sins, in Lloyd's eyes, and tucking it under his arm. "I'll just transition."

His father, his dumb, stupid father, wore the thing all the time. He wore it to dinner, where he'd ruin Lloyd's appetite just by the look of that thing; he wore it on cold autumn days, when he'd work out in the yard; he wore it around his _friends_—his poor friends who didn't deserve to see such a hideous work of what may or may not have been human hands.

Lloyd still shakes his head. He used to dream of throwing the thing out. Then…

Then.

Kai nods in the corner of Lloyd's eye, moving to sit against the second swing. "Yeah."

"We're throwing out his things, Kai." Lloyd's voice is rising against his will, but he can't help himself, "He's gone. He's really gone."

Kai nods again, solemn.

Lloyd can't believe it. He just can't. His father is alive, mostly well, where he is.

But he isn't coming back.

Lloyd feels like he's run into a brick wall. Or that he's been punched in the stomach. One of the two. Either way, he's breathless. He looks at the sky again as Kai rocks next to him, making the swing creak.

"You want to talk about it?" Kai asks next, voice surprisingly soft.

Kai would know how he feels. He's lost a father, too, a mother. Kai knows better than most, and he would know how to work Lloyd through it. But Lloyd can't talk about it for fear of breaking down into pieces. He shakes his head, back and forth.

"Alright," says Kai, "You don't have to," he looks ahead, adding, "Cole put his things back in the box. We're not going to throw it out—"

"No—!"

Kai's eyebrows fly up his face, and Lloyd rocks his swing, gripping the chains so hard it hurts.

Licking his lips, Lloyd looks at a distant tree, the slide, the seesaw. "No," he repeats, "We—you don't—" Lloyd cuts himself off and closes his eyes, taking a deep, shuddering breath. A skill he's worked on for years, Lloyd prides himself on his ability not to cry.

A moment later, he's able to speak again. He notices Kai watched him through his process, but he's past caring.

"Don't save it," he says, "we've...no reason to keep that stuff around anymore."

His father, his poor father, is gone. Lloyd has accepted this, done so for the last month and a half. It just never seemed so final before.

But...Lloyd thinks, getting rid of his things would be the final step. Yes, it would. He sighs, not feeling weightless anymore. Rather, he feels like a stone sinking into an abyss.

Kai's voice reaches him through his clouded thoughts, still the gentlest thing he's ever heard, "I find it helps to keep something around. Even just a little thing," when Lloyd finally looks back at him, he adds, "It's up to you."

Kai is open and understanding, and Lloyd has never, ever had a friend like him. For some reason, that makes him want to cry again, but he talks through it.

"You mean that?"

Kai smiles, "Trust me. I'm very wise."

Lloyd's instinct is to disagree, but there's truth to what Kai says, a product of both experience and his own knowledge, and he's sharing it with Lloyd. He is wise, in his own way, and Lloyd thanks whatever's left of his lucky stars for Kai, his best friend.

He nods, "Alright," Lloyd thinks of the sweater, where he saw it last, strewn half over the cobbled pathway, "The blanket, then."

A snort comes in response, and Lloyd looks up to see Kai stifling a sheepish smile as he says, "The blanket? Why not the—?"

"I'm throwing that sweater out myself," Lloyd nods solemnly, "That thing is hideous."

Kai laughs again, and Lloyd's spirits start to rise, slowly.

"Come on, now," Kai starts rocking his swing a little harder, "With the right pants, the perfect hairstyle, maybe a scarf, that sweater would make a rocking look."

"No," Lloyd swings a little, too, "It's ugly and gross and shouldn't be seen with the naked eye. I'm throwing it out, Kai."

Kai pumps his swing until he's higher than Lloyd, "I'm going to keep it and hide it in your bed or something."

Lloyd tries to propel himself higher, "And I'm gonna rearrange your teeth!"

Kai just laughs. Lloyd shakes his head, surprised to find himself laughing, too. He's thankful for it.

Soon, they're pumping their swings as high as they can go. After a while, Kai starts singing this dumb little song he learned in his youth. Lloyd catches on to the simple lyrics soon enough, and they sing and swing until they're too breathless to go any longer.

By that time, the afternoon rolls close to evening, but they've never cared for curfew. Kai thinks that they should head home anyway, so that Sensei won't worry. They walk on, then, two friends in darkening streets.

A gust of wind cuts past, making them shiver, and Kai says, "That blanket will serve you good, tonight."

Lloyd nods at the sidewalk, then, after a pause, reaches over and pulls his friend close. There's a little noise of surprise, but Kai doesn't question it as he's quick to hug him back. It's a brief gesture, hardly long enough for Lloyd to properly express just how much Kai means to him, but it suffices for today.

When Lloyd returns from brushing his teeth that night, the blanket is laid out on the bed, and a little chocolate bar is hidden under the pillow, half-crushed, but the sentiment is there.

Lloyd loves all his friends, really, but he just might like Kai best.

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**Thank you all for reading this far, and thank you for taking the time to follow or review this. You guys are truly the best; have a marvelous day!**


	3. Bookends

When Garmadon falls, the city is in ruins. The city has hardly ever a time when it isn't in ruins, and as Lloyd looks over it, he can't help but wonder why anyone would want to live here.

Cole tells him that it's probably cheaper to these days since property values would lower with each disaster, but that has everything to do with subjects Lloyd just isn't interested in, so he doesn't dwell on it. Instead he focuses on the people, universally threatened in this tragic land.

With time, it's difficult to think of anything else.

"Lloyd."

Kai finds him on the stone parapet of a low-income office building's roof, one of the few skyscrapers that neither burned nor collapsed. Lloyd's legs hang over the side, dangling far above the distant streets.

Lloyd jerks at the sound of his friend's voice; he still isn't used to hearing a sound he'd never thought he'd hear again, but he turns with a wide smile, overjoyed at seeing Kai alive and well. Currently, Kai is a wreck. His hair looks ridiculous, practically a rat's nest; he walks an odd gait, and he smells worse than the pile of laundry Jay never cleans out from under his bunk.

He's hardly better than Lloyd, frankly. Lloyd grins, so happy that he almost doesn't mind the stern expression locked on Kai's face.

He does wonder what he did to warrant such a look, since Kai's barely been back long enough for a reason to frown at him, but with Kai, it could be anything from Lloyd recklessly putting his life on the line to eating sweets after brushing his teeth. As Kai stands over him, hands perched on his hips like a mother waiting for their child to confess wrongdoing, Lloyd runs his tongue across his teeth. His breath smells vaguely of copper, so he hopes that if he talks in one direction, Kai won't notice the dental state.

"How are you?" says Kai, unsubtle about expecting an answer.

Hoping his friend won't inquire about his mental state, Lloyd shrugs.

"That's what I thought."

Lloyd glances over, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means exactly what you think it means."

The joy of being able to speak with his brother again is almost enough to hide the sliver of irritation working its way through Lloyd's temples.

Kai loses the stiff posture as he sits, flopping down with a sigh and perhaps a little less care than preferable for someone balancing hundreds of meters above an unforgiving sidewalk. But Lloyd can't trust Kai to be careful; not that he'd fall, regardless. Somehow, his friend manages to charm Lady Luck onto his side again and again; better for everyone, Lloyd thinks.

Kai draws his lips into a line, almost thin enough for a smile, and he holds his feet out straight, rocking them up and down. He's got holes in his boots, the largest of which allows Kai's sock-footed toe to poke out. After a second, Lloyd mimics his posture; he's got a hole in the same position, but on the opposite foot.

That makes Lloyd laugh, softly huffing behind lips that remained closed.

"When was the last time you've lied down?" Kai asks suddenly, eyebrows raised.

The query catches Lloyd by surprise, though in hindsight, he should've seen this coming. As much as Kai pretends not to, he'll find a way to worry over things that didn't deserve it, be it a stray strand of hair or the bags under Lloyd's eyes.

Though it's been long since Kai's had any real agency over him, a touch of red colors Lloyd's cheeks as he mutters, "None of your business."

"That long, huh?" Kai sighs, and there's something about it that makes Lloyd feel bad, pitied.

With the way life has gone for him over the past few weeks, Lloyd doesn't care for that, so he says, "Did you come all the way up here just to worry over me? Because that's the last thing I need right now."

"Oh yeah," Kai nods, "Sure."

"I'm serious!" Lloyd pulls his legs up and stands, balancing along the ridge and walking away; one wrong move would send him falling, "I'm fine. I've made it this far. Everyone's alright. I defeated my father."

Yes, victories, all of them. But why does Lloyd still feel so hollowed out? Especially now that he has his entire family back, his family that he loves more than anything in the world, more than chocolate and comic books? For a moment he stands sideways on the stone, gazing at the streets below. He wonders what it would look like if he fell.

Kai remains where he sat down, squinting in the light of the setting sun. He's still covered in dirt and grime from the First Realm, or wherever it was he'd been lost to.

Lloyd releases a long breath, emptying his lungs until they ache-or is that just the lingering effects of injury? Regardless, he says, "I'm so tired."

"I know you are, kiddo."

They let the wind do the talking for them, and a thought comes to Lloyd. It's the image of raindrops, or teardrops, splattering on a sidewalk as a storm picks up. It's a tragic idea, Lloyd thinks; the droplets fall so long that they surely must think they're flying, only to meet a tragic end with a sudden, hard, _splat!_ Sickened, he turns away from the streets and settles his eyes on the roof, a safer place.

Kai breaks the heavy silence with a shake as he says, "Well, how about you lie down for a minute?"

Though phrased like a question, it's more of a statement. It shouldn't leave many questions up to Lloyd, but they pop into his head anyway.

"Where?"

Kai smiles at him, then pats his lap, "Put your head here."

Lloyd almost loses his balance stepping backwards, "Excuse me?"

"C'mon, it's comfortable! Goodness knows I've eaten enough scooter pies."

"But that's…" Lloyd isn't sure what word he's looking for, "...weird!"

Kai frowns, offended by the remark, "Is not. Nya used to do it all the time."

"Used to!" Lloyd folds his arms close to his chest, looking everywhere but at Kai, "When she was little, maybe."

Kai pauses to ponder the statement. Then he says, thoughtful, "You're younger than you think you are, Lloyd."

He's not sure how to respond other than the gut reaction of "No, dope," He's as old as he thinks he is, and there's nothing on in all of Ninjago that can change that, apart from Tomorrow's Tea, of course.

Lloyd shakes his head, opting to stand there in silence. For a moment, they're quiet, and the world moves around them. Lloyd is tired. Lying down sounds just about the greatest thing in the world. Not here, though. It's weird.

"You'll feel better," Kai adds with a smile that does nothing to ease the feelings coursing through him at the moment.

Lloyd is pretty sure he won't; a nap for a hundred years wouldn't make him feel better, but he is a little tired, and he's still so happy to see his friend again that he might be willing to oblige the kind offer.

Lloyd thinks, standing and debating himself while Kai gives him a series of ridiculous expressions. After several long, painful moments, Lloyd comes to a decision. Sighing hard enough to let his friend know how he feels about the situation, he steps forward, holding up a finger.

"Just for one minute," he says.

Kai raises his eyebrows in a way that he thinks means, "sure, Lloyd," which he chooses to ignore as he sits back down and scoots over.

"And don't look at me while we're doing this," he adds as he lies back. His back aches as it relaxes, and Lloyd is suddenly aware of how exhausted he really is. He can't even remember the last time he slept.

"It's only awkward if you make it, Lloyd," Kai stares straight ahead anyway, gazing out over the smoking city, "It'll be quiet tonight," he whispers.

It will be, but a different kind of quiet than it was after Garmadon took over the city. Now the quiet is the aftermath sort, a mix of mourning and victory. Lloyd pushes the thought to the back of his mind as he focuses on trying to ease the tension in his body. He almost succeeds in relaxing his shoulders when he feels Kai put a hand in his hair.

"What is this?" Kai pulls his fingers through the dirty blond tangles; Lloyd would mind it if it didn't feel so nice, "Drywall?"

Lloyd shrugs, feeling better. Kai was right; though the parapet is hard and awful on his back, Kai is warm and solid beneath his head. It doesn't feel as weird as he thought it would. For a moment, he's reminded of a time, several times, when he was younger, he'd fall asleep on a couch or a bus and wake to find his head on Kai's shoulder.

That seems a million years ago, now.

Lloyd sighs and lets all the tension leak from his body as Kai continues pulling stuff from his hair.

"When was the last time you showered?" comes a question.

Lloyd has to think for a while, then he feels a grin form on his face.

"Ugh!" Kai takes his hand away and rubs it against the fabric of his gi while Lloyd snorts out a giggle.

"Come on, Kai," he says, "It's not like you've showered since Garmadon took over."

"I was in the First Realm," Kai frowns at him, but he doesn't look cross, "What's your excuse?"

"I had other things on my mind."

Kai drops it, and all is quiet. Lloyd wishes he'd go back to rubbing his head. It made him feel like a cat, warm and loved and safe.

"I'm glad you're back, Kai," Lloyd says as he lays there, listening to the sounds of shouting and the occasional siren below. The city truly is in ruins.

"It takes more than being thrown into another dimension to kill me."

The memory of seeing the Bounty crushed pops into Lloyd's brain, and he grimaces and tilts his head to the sky. He finds a nice open area near them; there might have once been a building there, and Lloyd doesn't think of the people inside. He thinks of the sky, which at this time of day, is easy to get lost in. Kai goes back to fiddling with his hair again, and he smiles.

"Besides," Kai adds, "Someone's gotta take care of you."

"I was fine," Lloyd is quick to insist, "I can take care of myself, and besides, I had Nya with me. And Skylor, and Dareth..."

"I'm not sure Dareth counts," says Kai, grinning, "but I'm glad they were there for you. They just can't replace someone like me."

"No one could ever replace you, Kai." Lloyd says to the sky, quiet.

Kai's feet do a little kick as he sits, happy as a clam. Lloyd grins.

"And the same applies to you," Kai gets red in the cheeks, "Not to be cheesy, though. You're still my bratty little brother." He gives Lloyd's head a pat, the greatest feeling so far. It flows throughout his body, and he's suddenly very sleepy.

Or maybe he's been sleepy this whole time, for weeks.

"I'm tired," he says.

"You can sleep," says Kai, "I won't let you fall."

Lloyd nods once and lets his eyes close. He can always rely on Kai to follow through his promises, when they're good, and when they're so ridiculous one wonders where he comes up with such ideas.

With memories of happier times clouding his mind, Lloyd lets himself sleep. The stars never shine in the city, but that night, they're on fire.

* * *

**So there will probably be a fourth (and last, I swear) part to this since one of these first three chapters wasn't supposed to be in here (try and guess which one if you're feeling up for that). It'll be up sometime soon, though I can't give a specific date.**

**Thank you for reading this far, and thank you for your continued interest in this story. Have a fantastic day!**


	4. Quietly

Lloyd uses his hands to measure the years. It's easy to look in the mirror and miss the lines spreading across his forehead, or the crow's feet growing larger around his eyes, but he sees his hands every day. They gnarl with age, like the branches of a withered blue oak, so, like a tree, Lloyd will count the rings.

Kai is different. He uses his hair, though Lloyd can't say that it is the most accurate way of doing so. Grey hair comes from more than time; it comes from stress, fear, choices of lifestyle. By Kai's measurements, he was elderly by age fifty.

Given their line of work, hair is inaccurate. In fact, Kai found his first grey hair at age twenty-seven. Lloyd still remembers the day.

Kai was hysterical.

"Lloyd!" he yelled over the fierce laughter of Cole and Jay, who were clutching their stomachs and, in Jay's case, rolling on the floor, "This is your fault!"

Lloyd couldn't see it at the time. "What's wrong?" he said through a grin that made his cheeks ache.

It was a single hair, not long enough even to match the length of the rest of his head, but Kai cradled it in his hands like it was a nesting bird having fallen from a tree. "You've done it now, Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon," Kai wailed, "You've done worn me out! It's the beginning of the end!"

_Not really_, thought Lloyd, thinks Lloyd. Kai's always worried about his hair, but it's a pitiful measurement, more of a ballpark of age than anything. For the ninja, it's a better guess of stress levels.

All his friends (except Zane, of course) went grey, and Lloyd can thankfully say (and adamantly insist) that not every strand could be attributed to him and his self-sacrificing tendencies. Ninjago's perils never ceased, but time granted Lloyd students of his own, so the weight of the world was eventually shared with far more capable shoulders.

Lloyd thanks the ninja for his hair, white as snow and silver at the roots, because if it weren't for them, he doubts he would have made it past ten. He thanks them for his life, his students, his possessions, and especially his hands.

Lloyd thanks them all, but he finds himself thanking Kai a lot more these days, as he spends more time reflecting how far he's come. It's one thing to have a family to run to when he skins his knee, it's another to have someone yanking him by the collar out of harm's way every time he winds up in a precarious situation.

Turns out, that happened a lot. A descendent of a god, a dragon, an oni and whatever else his Uncle Wu forgot to mention is not in this world for peace.

And neither is Kai, who was there for him time and time again, like a mother hen following her idiot child as he fumbles his way through the thrills of life. Lloyd's tried returning the favor, but he just can't catch up. Some debts can't be paid, anyway.

In the end, it doesn't matter, and it never did. Lloyd walks the temple grounds, staff clicking steadily against ancient stones as he searches for his friend.

A crooked old man, Kai's spent the past year alone among company, wandering the grounds with his head tilted towards the skies, his gaze stretching further. Lloyd used to believe that grief made him this way, but it's something else, too.

The threat of death was one they all were familiar with, but it still struck them by surprise.

Cole died six months ago. He spent his last year tired and unable to walk. Being both the strongman and heavy hitter of the group had not served him well, and he was never quite the same after his fall off the Bounty. He passed in his sleep, face set like stone. Jay exclaimed the next morning (with tears in his eyes that no one would comment on) that it was all that cake that did his friend in, but Lloyd knows the answer is simpler than that. Like all living things, Cole simply ran out of heartbeats.

Four months later, Jay passed in his bed, holding Nya's hand. He made her promise to shoot fireworks at his funeral, wanting to go out with a bang, he said. It's a dream he's spoken of since seventeen (minus the part where they send his body off a cliff at the wheel of a baby blue convertible), so they felt obligated to honor the request. The night of his funeral, fireworks flew throughout Ninjago as the world remembered a hero.

The deaths hit hard, and Kai's been especially distant since then. He doesn't laugh like he once did, doesn't make snarky comments about how great he is anymore. When they sit down for dinner, Lloyd feels like he's talking to Kai from across a long suspension bridge, rather than just the length of the table.

Once a bonfire blazing in a firepit, Kai's spirit now is more akin to a candle, burning low in a forgotten corner. Lloyd tries to help, reaching out whenever he can. It hurts him that his friend is like this; with all the times Kai's saved him marked on a list Lloyd keeps in his head, the most and least he can do is return the favor, if just once.

After a morning of searching, Lloyd spots his dear friend bent over in the temple gardens, pulling at weeds and things from beneath the large leaves of acorn squash and sunburst pumpkins. He's a wide-brimmed hat on his head, and it makes him look like a farmer you'd find smiling on the front of some commercial product.

Lloyd has to laugh at the image that makes in his head, knowing Kai would rather be caught dead.

Absorbed in his own world, Kai doesn't see Lloyd approach until his sneakers are right in his line of vision. He squints up at him with drooping, squishy eyes, like an old dog's.

"You're out early," he says, though it's mid-morning and well after when Lloyd usually wakes, "Your students have the day off or something?"

"I have them washing the training grounds," replies Lloyd, "Top to bottom, nothing but a mop and a scrub brush. Should keep them out of trouble for fifteen minutes."

Kai huffs a chuckle that's halfway a wheeze, and Lloyd smiles wryly. Not until Lloyd had students of his own did he realize how much his uncle had to put up with, and his respect for Wu grows with each passing day.

"What brings you out here?" says Kai, stooping to thump a pumpkin; the best way to tell if they're ripe, he always said.

"You do," _dope,_ he thinks, "I want to speak with you."

"You didn't have to come out here to do that," says Kai, standing and moving to a row of okra, where foot long pods hang split open in the sun. When Kai touches them, the seeds inside rattle.

"I don't know how else I would, Kai," Lloyd cocks his gaze as he watches Kai work. Some days, he's sure his friend has gone senile, but he's never sure, since the stuff Kai says isn't all too different from what he did in his youth.

"Something is bothering you," he continues, direct in a way that his uncle never was, "I want to help."

Kai continues examining the okra, not really doing anything but looking at them and touching with withered old hands, speckled like a toad, as Jay used to say.

"You can't help me," Kay says, so quiet Lloyd isn't sure if he spoke to him or the okra, "I appreciate the concern. Just go on back to your students."

Lloyd frowns and grinds his staff into the dirt, making a deep, round hole. "No."

He hopes his stubbornness will goad Kai into participating in one of their back-and-forths, but Kai just looks at him before lifting his hat to rub at his hair. He still styles it at this age, though a lot less wildly. He should look ridiculous (Lloyd tells him as much), but Lloyd would be lying if he said he wasn't envious of his brother for looking so cool in old age.

Some things only Kai can pull off.

"Just tell me what's on your mind," says Lloyd, "You've been off, and you know it," a beat, then, "You can't spend all your time thinking of nothing."

Despite the mood he's in, Kai smiles, "That is a lot of time with an empty head."

They chuckle together, and Kai looks down as he repeats, "Time."

Lloyd watches.

Kai stares at the dirt, toeing a path through the rich umber dust. When he looks up, he's donned a worried frown, "You'll remember me when I die, won't you?"

The question catches him by surprise, almost a shock, "What?"

Kai stares, mouth set in an expression Lloyd and his tasteless brain can only describe as dead serious, so Lloyd continues, "You spend all this time thinking about your death?"

Kai shrugs.

"That's morbid!"

"Well," Kai casts him a side eyed stare that used to kill back in the day, "I have to, don't I?" he moves to a row of trellises, fallen over from the weight of dying lima vines, "After all, it's not like I have much left."

"Much?"

"Time."

"Don't be silly," a shot of fear fires through his heart, the way it always does when Lloyd entertains the idea of living on without any one of his friends, "Is this because of Cole and Jay?"

Cole and Jay, he's learned to live without; after all, his friends aren't really gone, but he doesn't know if he could do the same with Kai. As he stands, he thinks of all the mornings he'd wake to find Kai standing at a window towards the temple's east wing. From it, you can overlook the temple's grounds, as well as a special garden where they planted flowers in honor of their fallen friends. Had Kai been thinking of his flowers, too?

"It's because of me, just me," Kai's eyes slide empty again as he looks at the shriveled limas; seeds long shed, the shells hang spread like wings, "Think about the logic, here. Zane's a nindroid with eons left in his system; you and Nya have several years if you stay out of trouble, and me…" Kai closes his eyes and shakes his head, "It was either going to be me, Cole, or Jay, and with the two of them gone, I'm right up at the head of the line."

Kai is speaking from a perspective Lloyd won't know for years, if he even knows it at all, and all his knowledge as a sensei can't help him understand. He tries, "It scares you that you're next?"

Kai looks to the sky again. He's looking at everything but at Lloyd. "I'm not scared," he says, voice quiet, "I know death enough to not be scared...but," he hangs long on the 'but', "I thought I'd have more time. Even when I was sure we were going to die, I thought I'd have more time."

Lloyd understands as much. He still goes to bed at night expecting to get up the next day.

"I don't know how to explain it," Kai snaps back into the moment as he scratches his chin, "I've never had to look at my life backwards, before."

Lloyd blinks, "So _that's _what you've been thinking about?"

Kai shrugs again, "I've got a lot of life behind me. A lot more than in front. Who knew I'd live this long, huh?" for the first time, he laughs as he says, "Especially after all those years of you running me into the ground!"

Lloyd smiles through the wave of apprehension that's washed over him, "Well, it's your own fault if you expected me to go easy on you."

Kai laughs again, really laughs, and Lloyd forgets his fear.

"I'm surprised I never suffered a heart attack," Kai rubs his chest as he says it, before turning serious once more, "But you'll remember me, won't you?"

"Oh Kai," Lloyd huffs, "I couldn't forget you if I tried."

He's almost offended that Kai would even wonder, but Kai continues, "No, no. It's easy to not forget somebody. I'm talking _remembering._"

"Of course, I will," aghast, Lloyd looks his friend over. He's old. Different, but in many ways, the same Kai who'd make faces at him from across the supper table, who'd slip him chocolate when no one was looking, who'd sing along to dumb songs while mopping the Bounty's deck.

He always ended up chasing Lloyd across it, grinning like a maniac while Lloyd slipped and slid across the wet wood. Often barefoot, Lloyd usually skinned himself or wound up with a heel full of splinters, but it was okay, because Kai helped him clean it up. He had the best band-aids, the kinds with Fritz Donnegan or cool colors on the front.

Lloyd smiles at the sky, "Of course I'll remember you. Every day. You gave me a home, a family," he points to himself, "I'm your bratty little brother, remember? Of course I'll remember."

At this, Kai blinks. An odd expression flickers through his eyes, as though he's recalling some distant thought.

Lloyd isn't sure what to make of it, so he continues, "I'll remember everything; all the times you saved my sorry behind, the things you tell me," he pauses to laugh, "You say a lot of dumb stuff, you know that, right?"

"Of course," Kai scoffs, softened by the kind words and perhaps even the jest, "but unlike you, I didn't become a sensei to pass my idiocy as profound wisdom."

Lloyd sneers, a comeback already up his sleeve, "You just became a crazy old man."

"Perhaps," Kai grins, "but so did you."

Lloyd lets him win this round, and he follows his friend throughout the rest of the garden, through crops and orchards and eventually bushes of flowers. The quiet feels better than it did when Lloyd arrived.

When they reach the end of the garden, Kai rolls his shoulders and puts his hands on his hips. "I think that does it," he says, though Lloyd isn't sure what he's done, "Thanks for seeing me, Lloyd. You might want to see your students now, assuming they haven't torn each other apart."

Lloyd grimaces, having forgotten of his students quite completely, blaming Kai. Before he can express as much to his friend, Kai turns and walks off, a thoughtful look on his face. Something has changed since he arrived, and though Lloyd can't say what it is, he thinks it's something good, because Kai turns around to wave.

* * *

The following month is better in many ways. Though Kai is still a candle, he dances instead of flickers, smiling more and even participating in some of Lloyd's classes now and again. Lloyd still catches him staring out over the flowers in the morning, but he's usually gone by the time the last of the fog dissipates with the sunshine, and his mind is spent with far more pleasant subjects.

A month after the conversation, Kai interrupts a meditation session and drags him down to his room, a small nook at the end of a hall, next to the bathroom. Lloyd doesn't mean to complain throughout the path there, but meditation is the only peace and quiet he gets in a day, so he's sure to tell Kai as much.

"Relax," says his friend, unusually cheerful, "I've got something for you. You remember that talk we had a while back?"

Lloyd does, mostly what Kai said about not having much time left, but Kai seems on another subject entirely. Kai leads him over to the bed, where he starts digging through his nightstand. When he stands back up, he's a blacksmith's hammer in his hands, muscles taut under the weight of the object.

"I've been doing a lot of thinking," Kai explains, "and talking—with Nya, that is. She agreed with me."

He hands Lloyd the hammer. It's heavy, tarnished with scars of use and streaks of black, not really much to look at.

"This is for you," he says, "It's an heirloom; dates back three generations. Some families pass down diaries or wedding dresses, but my family passes down this hammer."

He chuckles, and Lloyd just stares at the object, the weight of Kai's words hitting late and stunning him into silence.

"Kai," he breathes.

"I've been thinking about what you said, and you're right! You're our bratty little brother," says Kai, words spilling over each other, "Which means you've earned heirloom rights. It's in good condition; I'll admit I mostly used it as a paperweight, but that's not all I wanted to give you."

He stoops back to the nightstand, and Lloyd struggles not to cry.

"I also wanted to give you this," he places a small object into Lloyd's palm, forcing his fingers to curl around it, since Lloyd's lost the ability to move, "It's my most prized possession."

Lloyd looks at the object through blurred eyes. It's a bottle of hair gel, half used.

Despite the roar of emotions flooding his senses, Lloyd's enough sense to say, "Um…"

"I can't exactly give you my hair, can I?" Kai gives him a pointed look, "Especially since it's all gone."

"You still have all your hair," Lloyd says, voice growing smaller with each word, like it does when he's about to cry.

"Grey hair. Grey and thin," Kai shakes his head, "Look, Lloyd. The point of this isn't the hair gel. It's not the hammer. I just wanted to let you know that," he pauses to swallow, and Lloyd realizes he isn't the only one struggling with emotion, "I wanted to tell you—that you mean so much to me. I never wanted a brother as a kid," Kai looks at him, "because I thought a sister was more than enough, but along you came, and you've been good to me. Always have."

Kai gives him a pat on the shoulder, "So, what I'm trying to say is, thank you. For all these years, thank you. Thanks for giving me a chance."

Lloyd blinks. He always thought it was the other way around. Kai gave him the chance to be a good brother, a friend, and as he looks at the objects in his hands, he thinks he must have succeeded somewhere along the line. Kai must've, too.

Kai still has his hand on his shoulder, "You alright?"

Lloyd nods. He tries to say thank you, but what he's thanking is too big for such little words. "I'll be fine."

"Yeah you will," Kai grins and pulls him into a hug, "You're going to be just fine."

He's not just talking about now, and Lloyd smiles.

"Well," Kai sighs as he pulls away, "I was thinking of going to the creamery on the corner for a milkshake. Wanna join? Triple chocolate mint, on me!"

Lloyd sputters out a laugh as he pulls himself together. Kai switches through subjects so fast, they risk whiplash. Lloyd's stomach growls, and more importantly, his heart leaps at the idea, but, "I've got to return to my students."

"You don't have to," Kai replies easily, "They won't miss you for another hour, at least."

"I can't skip classes!"

"Sure, you can!"

"I'm the teacher!" Lloyd feels himself getting convinced, anyway, reminded of the many times he and Kai would do this to Uncle Wu or his father.

"What are they going to do?" Kai smirks at him—the same old Kai, indeed, "It's not like they can punish you."

That's an excellent point, but Lloyd has a feeling he'll pay, regardless. But Kai sweetens the deal with the promise of rainbow sprinkles and maybe even a trip to the arcade, afterwards, the kind that still plays all his favorite games, 'oldies', now. Lloyd feels obliged to go. After all, Kai's burning brighter, and they've only so many more times to do this.

The afternoon is bright and blue that day, and Lloyd spends it with Kai, his best friend, his family.

Lloyd will say to anyone who asks that he doesn't have a favorite ninja, but he does, and it's Kai.

* * *

**The chapter has been the Headcanon Express; thank you for riding.**

**And thank you all for reading! This story has been a pleasure to write, and your support has truly been wonderful. Thank you all for reading, reviewing, and following (thanks as well to Anonymous fan, Mikey, JBomb217, and other Guests, who I cannot thank privately)! You guys rock!**

**As usual with these vignette based stories, please feel free to tell me which chapter you liked best (I get curious), and have a fantastic day! Thank you again!**


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